The Four Rules of Dog Naming

The last post got me thinking about dog names.

First rule for a good dog name: Does it sound stupid when I yell it at the top of my lungs?

You would think this is an obvious rule but here is an example of ‘dumb when yelled’: I know of a dog named Brown Dog, which makes it sound like you can’t remember your dog’s name when you shout it across the park.

Second Rule: Does it sound like a 4 year old picked it out?

Yelling Princess, Pookie, Opie, Tiffany, Sweetie Pie can even embarrass the dog involved.

Third Rule: Try to be original.

This is also known as the DAVE Rule. My husband has never been in a class that didn’t have at least one other Dave in it. These are the most common dogs names (as unscientifically compiled by me) Max, Sam, Molly, Maggie, and Sadie. They seem to fall into the categories of people names that are no longer used by people. Let’s branch out folks, how about Ed, Oliver, Carl, Victor, Otto, Henry…there are still some decent names left. And the second most common naming source for dogs is a play on their color. I have seen my share of color coordinated names - some good, some bad. Copper, Penny, Shadow, White Fang, Smokey Bill, Blackie…the possibilities are endless though often repeated.

Fourth Rule: Not that Original or you will be explaining the name FOREVER.

This would be my own personal mistake. My dogs are Vector and Inertia, if you can believe it. One is named after her ability to only run in a straight line, thus making all rabbits save if they merely turn left. And her sister after her ability to not be moved - she is the body at rest remains at rest. Being a physicist, my husband gets the blame for the names, but I am the one who did it.