Thursday, November 30, 2006

Too Smart for Her Own Good

That must be it. Roxy is just so darn smart, she has come full circle to stupid.

Sometimes I have to divide my doggies. When dogs don't get along, I shut the gate that separates the play yard into two areas. Only problem is that I can only be on one side at a time.

Roxy, being a rather smart dog, figured out that she could stuff a tennis ball under the gate and I would be able to pick it up a throw it for her. She brings the ball back, shoves is under, I throw the ball over the fence - repeat, repeat, repeat.

Only problem is that Roxy shoves her ball under the fence even when I am on her side.

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

What's in a name?

I mess up people names all the time. I have never been able to remember names and I am famous for trading people's names with those of their friends. UGH. But I can remember dog's names. Why, I just don't know, are they somehow stored in different part of my brain? When I was selling real estate, correction TRYING to sell real estate, I could always remember the dog's name but never his owners - the ones actually buying or selling a house. This was my first clue that I had somehow ended up in the wrong business. My bank balance, or lack there of, was another.

I think I made the right career move this time.

Well, maybe. I seem to be mangling even the dog names this week. I kept calling Goofy, Gunny. Goofy is huge and fluffy, Gunny is a Rott and just huge. I called Remington, Maggie, but that is a little more forgivable, those two are identical. And then there is Shilo.

Pronounced SHY - LO, not SIGH - LO.
"Oh, honey, did I just call you a barn? So sorry."

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow!

Because, snow is just Mother Nature's way of telling you that you don't have to scoop the poop.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

Labrador-Rottweiler MIX?

No, Buddy is more of a SPLICE than a MIX.
He has a Labrador head and a Rottweiler body.

Friday, November 17, 2006

Modern Medicine vs Animal Husbandry

I have been subjected to a number of medical test this week as the doctors try to figure out what is wrong with my stomach. So far every test has come back - negative, normal, just fine, or nothing wrong.

If I wasn't just SICK AS A DOG, I'd be as HEALTHY AS A HORSE.

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

The Yawning Dog Ranch Guide to Vacation Planning

There must be something in human nature that causes people with 3 week vacations to forget about the dog until the last minute, whereas those people only going away for an overnight will call 6 months in advance.

I just turned away a 3 week stay at my kennel because the middle week of a cruise is Thanksgiving week. Not the best advanced planning that I have witnessed.

Having to say 'Sorry, no room at the inn.' to people has led me to some very important lessons.

Don't Travel For Holiday's
I have tried to follow this rule all my life, and now I have the perfect excuse,"I just can't. The kennel is full and I have to stay home."

Move Your Holiday's
My mother invented this rule. We once had Christmas - tree, stocking, gifts and all - at Thanksgiving because my older sister was pregnant and due just before the actual Christmas. It was fun to roll the two holidays together, turkey on Thursday and a Christmas ham on Saturday. This also created the longest, most restful Christmas break that I ever experienced. I resurrected this rule to have Thanksgiving the Saturday before with my parents and the REAL Thanksgiving with my husband's family. Try this yourself, it could save a marriage.

Know When to Go
This is something I didn't know until I started my kennel. These are the empty weekends at my kennel. The ONLY empty weekends my kennel. And if my place is empty, everyone is staying home. So, GO, Travel! Get while the getting is good! You should have the roads, airports, hotels...everything all to yourself.

Mark your calendars...
The last 3 weeks of January
Everyone is fat, tired, broke and holed up at home.
All but the Valentine's Weekend in February
Too cold, still broke, still holed up at home.
March or April, the middle two weeks of which ever month does not have Easter
Caution, some people have already gotten their tax refunds back, so some vacations due occur at this time.
May, feel free to travel anytime except for Memorial Day
Everyone is too busy with end of the school year programs, graduations, and packing for their June trips. I especially recommend Las Vegas for Mother's Day. The weather is perfect and the town is just empty. I guess taking mom to Sin City to celebrate has not really caught on.
Stay home June, July and August, if humanly possible
The entire country piles in the car and goes to another part of the country. No one is home, they are all on the road.
September, skip Labor Day
But the rest of the month is good. Everyone is either recovering from an August trip or the kids are back in school.
Excellent for travel, since the kids are stuck at home plus the weather usually cooperates in October.
November, the week and weekend prior to Thanksgiving
I have had 3 days straight with no dogs and only 3 bookings for this weekend.
December the weekend after Thanksgiving up to Christmas week
The weather is better, the airports are not mob scenes and the cities look their absolute best already dressed up for Christmas.

And best of all, when you call for dog reservations at these times, I will be able to say, "no problem!"

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

A Day Off?

Today, I am off to lecture my husband's engineering class on resume writing and interviewing. Normally, I would be thrilled with a chance to teach, but this particular class meets at 6:45 in the MORNING. ugg.

My husband tried to sell the idea by pointing out that he would take my morning doggie-duty.

A very kind offer, but if he is going to get up with the dogs I want a reward of staying in bed, not getting up even earlier and driving into town.

But, I have accepted and off I go to make sure these engineers know how to get a job.

Only thing, my husband gets to sleep in anyway - turns out the kennel is empty. I haven't had a day with no dogs since January and I don't even get to enjoy sleeping in. ugg.

Monday, November 13, 2006

Winter's Here!

Well, at least it is here for this week. It was 70 degrees last Thursday and in the 30's on Saturday. Those kinds of weather changes can give you whiplash.

I just have to remember to watch out for too much doggie love - this is the time of year for dog spit-induced frostbite.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Have you survived The High Holy Day of Refined Sugar?

We had an all day candy based frenzy around here. Except for me, who is diligently trying to stay on a no sugar diet. Let just say that I went as Grumpy for Halloween.

Now, you don't have to stay out of the kid's candy but do keep Fido out of it. Chocolate is not poisonous to dogs - it just ups their heartrate and blood pressure. For some smaller dogs that is enough to give them a heart attack. Not my dogs, though. Vector once ate 3 dozen chocolate chip cookies in the middle of the night and we only found out when she didn't eat her breakfast in the morning.

Be careful and go ahead keep all the chocolate for yourself - you are just doing it to protect the doggies.